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TV Dinner Palace Review


November 30th, 2007

The Eat SheetThis restaurant has TV’s all over the place.  Big ones.  Eh, I’m talking 19 to 22 inches.  I can’t get that luxury at home, so I head over to TV Dinner Palace to watch all my sports games on their rabbit ear antennas.  Suckers.  It’s an after work, too lazy to cook, paradise.

Name: TV Dinner Palace

Slogan: “The Home of Molten Dessert”

Setting: Casual, shoes are optional.

Distinguishing Characteristics: Lazy Boy easy chairs, TV’s, and television dinner trays.

Price: $4.95.  All meals are all inclusive.  They include semi-equal portions of meat, potato, vegetable, and flaming hot dessert.

Cuisine: Mostly Frozen American Comfort Foods (Hungry Man).

Feature Entree: Hungry Man Salisbury Steak with mashed potatoes, corn, and liquid fire mystery dessert.

The Eat Sheet is a collection of restaurants frequented by Gil on a regular basis.  He takes great pride in selecting frugal, but elegant eateries for his readers.  Each restaurant is hand selected by Gil, and must meet his rigorous testing matrix.  The matrix consists of one guideline… Price.  Check back for more of Gil’s Eat Sheet.

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Solid Lock Fantasy Sports Picks


November 28th, 2007

Fantasy SportsWith several fantasy sports kicking into high gear.  I though I'd give you several solid lock picks.  All of these picks have been heavily scouted, and are guaranteed to succeed.  This time, I'll be covering the NFL, NBA, and NHL for you fantasy fanatics.

National Football League

1. Larry Johnson – RB: After an excellent year on the Charlotte Hornets, this guy is ready for a breakout this season.  He recently signed a huge Converse shoe deal, so he's got plenty to play for.

2. Byron Sandwich – QB: Even though this guy recently had surgery, I think he's a viable player.  Seriously, the Atlanta Falcons are definitely lacking in this core position.  Pick him up.

3. Kevin Esther – WR: This guy is simply amazing.  The only other person the Chicago Bulls could have drafted would have been the road runner.

National Basketball Association

1.  Colby Brian – SG: – He's great.  Class act all the way around.  Bonus: You should be able to pick him up on the cheap.

2.  Bill Walton – C: – The center position has become deluded.  I expect Walton to emerge a star.  Especially after completing his hit show, The Waltons, in which a farm family grows up during the great war.

National Hockey League

1. Brian Leech – D:– This is a dicey pick, but I think he'll pan out.  I know he's known for Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous, but I think he has a couple good years left in him. Take a chance.  The Raiders did.

Thanks for checking out my picks, now go forth and prosper.

(Editor's Note: Ricky's selections have not been verified.  Some of the players above may be inactive, retired, injured, dead, non-existent or play for entirely different sports.  Please do not make any wagers with these picks.

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Headlines: November 27, 2007


November 27th, 2007

O.J. Simpson Ordered To Give Felony Charges To Goldman Family
LAS VEGAS – Yesterday, all of O.J. Simpson’s felony charges were transferred to the Goldman family.  According to the fine print of Simpson’s 1997 wrongful death judgment, the Goldman family was to be awarded all of Simpson’s post trial acquisitions, including criminal penalties.  Fred Goldman will be tried for robbery with a deadly weapon and other felonies later this year.

Microsoft Accidentally Lets Microsoft.com Lapse
REDMOND – In a major Internet mistake, the Microsoft Corporation inadvertently let the domain name http://www.microsoft.com expire.  The domain was accidentally purchased by local entrepenuer Barry Watkins from GoDaddy for $8.95 a year.  Microsoft has offered Watkins 2 million dollars or the company’s surplus of Zune inventory for the domain.  Watkins told reporters that the purchase was an accident.  He had intended to purchase the domain http://www.microloft.com.  Watkins is the inventor of the MicroLoft, a portable sleeping accessory.

Work Continues On This Old House
BOSTON – Work has yet to stop on This Old House. The project began in 1979 with a simple drywall repair, and shows no signs of stopping.  Carpenters are now planning to re-restore the portions of the house that were first renovated close to thirty years ago.  This Old House is a three bedroom, 2 and a half bath colonial built in the early 1950’s.

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Wrestling Beatles


November 26th, 2007

Wrestling Beatles

Andrew looks on in horror as Paul crushes Ringo's thorax.

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Keep It In The Closet

In this episode of Keep It In The Closet, Stephen discusses the masses wearing wrinkled clothes on a daily basis and the affect it has today's society.  This episode is big.

Keep It In The Closet highlights the latest disasters in the fashion world.  Stephen's blunt and straight to the point approach gives you the back door insight into the world of high design.  Press play to listen…

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Football Field of Dreams


November 19th, 2007

Football Field of DreamsIn the market for another sports title, Universal Studios began an ambitious project.  A project most people thought was ridiculous.  Trying to match the original success of Field of Dreams, Universal began production on…

Football Field of Dreams

The plot was unimaginative and varied little from the original.

A farmer by the name of Roy Kinsella (Kevin Costner), begins to hear voices telling him to build a football field where a current crop of sunflowers grow.  Much to the amusement of the local townsfolk, Kinsella builds his football field.

The plot strays a bit in the next sequence, in which Roy forgets to put up the goal posts.   There is a two year gap until he hears another voice reminding him that he didn’t “technically” finish the field.  Kinsella completes the job.

After the field’s completion, football legend Bart Starr emerges from the sunflower field and meets Roy.  However, Bart Starr isn’t dead, therefore writers scrambled to rewrite the script to suggest that Starr has Alzheimer’s and has wondered away from his family.

Kinsella then goes on a wild chase to hunt down author John Grisham.  This sequence was to include exploding cars and machine guns.

Roy finally returns to his field, almost bankrupt, with Grisham and Pete Rose.

In the meantime a slew of dead or simply retired players emerge from the sunflower field to begin practicing for the big game.  Only a single game is played, because most of the players get injured.  The players are not in the prime of their lives.

Kinsella is also reconnected with a deceased uncle, Ralph Kinsella, whom he didn’t really care for.

Kostner was to play Roy Kinsella, who was of no relation to Ray Kinsella from the original movie.  Ray Liotta  also signed on to return, but this time as Pete Rose.

The film failed to receive the financial backing needed to film the extravagant action scenes.  The project was shelved…

Project Redlight chronicles the movies that never made it in Hollywood.  They were discussed and bandied about, but ultimately a decision was made to pass on them.  The suggested movies are presented here with all of the details known at the time of their cancellation.

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What are your thoughts on the current writers' strike?

Hudson
"I definitely think that they should just get back on the job.  How am I supposed to unwind after a hard days work when there are no new shows?  It's a shame, Desperate Housewives is getting good again."
 
Ricky
"Sports aren't scripted.  Nuff said.  No, this is not a good time to discuss whether professional wrestling is fake.  It's not."
 
Gil
"I don't think these people need to be making more money.  If you can't live off of $300 a month you're doing something wrong.  Maybe they should try wearing paper bag underpants like the rest of us!"
 
Vince
"You can't blame a guy for trying to score an extra buck.  That's the way the world turns.  I'm all for it.  By the way, can I borrow a five spot?"
 

Stephen
"I'm a little disappointed in some of the slogans.  Seriously aren't these people supposed to be writers?  Don't even get me started about some of the ensembles I've seen on the line." 

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The Kitchen Cabinet Accident


November 15th, 2007

 
[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6W6-bKZDF00]
 
A nasty run-in with a dangerous kitchen cabinet is nothing to laugh about. 
 

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Finding Meat on the Cheap


November 14th, 2007

The Fru-GilIn today's episode of The Fru-Gil: Gil's Money Saving Tips, Gil discusses a brand new way to get meat on the cheap.  This tip could save you thousands.  Don't miss it!

The Fru-Gil is the Internet's finest source of audio advice on saving money.  Gil has painstakingly perfected and practiced every money saving tip he presents, and they have provided him with  the luxurious life that he never thought was possible.  This could change your life.  Press the play button to listen… 

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The K&J Lemonade Stand: Cool stuff for the young at heart!



Hide in the Burlap Sack


November 13th, 2007

If someone asks you to play a game of "Hide In the Burlap Sack," don't.

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