Characters Final Frame

President BushWASHINGTON –  President Bush on Tuesday announced the creation of a brand new special task force to fight drugs, racial intolerance, and generally kick ass. 

“After much thought, I think this is gonna be pretty cool,” Bush said at a press conference in which he announced John Rambo, Mr. T, and Walker Texas Ranger would be leading his new vigilante group, called "The Action Friends."

When the press questioned the selection of two fictional characters, President Bush simply responded by saying. “It’s pretty Bad Ass huh?”

Colonel Trautman expressed his pride for John Rambo, who was unable to attend due to AWOL activity, by saying he “Was glad that John could pull his life together.  It’s been a long time since that vagrancy arrest.”

Mr. T was on hand for the press conference and was a bit peeved that his fellow leaders were unable to attend.   He looked depressed under his gold chains, but after giving a shout out to Gary Coleman, “T” announced plans to open a chain of themed restaurants with his new comrades called, “Planet Forgotten Action Star.” 

The restaurant will apparently feature memorabilia from the three semi-stars as well as collectibles from Dolph Lungren and “Hercules” Kevin Sorbo.

The Task Force’s first order of duty is to infiltrate the White House and watch Suburban Commando with the President.

Walker Texas Ranger was unable to attend the press conference because he is currently appearing in early morning re-runs.

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