Characters Final Frame

Traffic JamIn one hell of a traffic jam, my deepest desires sauntered into my head.   Mostly to look around and to see what I’ve done with the place. 

While my car is pressed ass to ankles on the freeway, I start contemplating my life as a giving being.   After determining that I give very little, I decided to play God.  You heard me, God. 

Who allowed such a burden to be placed on my shoulders?  The Madison Metropolitan Department of Transportation and the various subcontractors who thought that a mere three lanes of traffic would suffice.  So, here I sit. 

You may ask yourself, “How was he playing God?”  Maybe you should be a little patient, what is this twenty questions? 

I first realized that I was in control of life when I glanced down at my white gabardine suit.  Uh… God wears white.  It’s in the Bible, possibly the book of Ruth.  In my suit, on the crowded highway, I now had complete control of who gets on and off. 

Take a number baby!  I’ll let you go lady because you’re are hot.  I will not let you pass lady, because I’m not sure if you are a lady. 

And to the guy on the bike, Who are you kidding?  You may be beating traffic now, but in three weeks you’ll be in the ICU.  Not so brilliant smart guy!  It doesn’t matter how much reflective clothing you wear someone will eventually hunt you down, probably an old white man with cataracts that’s addicted to medicinal alcohol. 

I, alone, am the gatekeeper to the highway.  Are you Gozer? 

I only have two minutes, so I’ve got to act quick.  I let a car in, being the nice guy that I am.  Then, I turn into a complete jerk and refuse to allow others on.  I found myself drunk with power and actually thinking to myself, “Look I’ve done my good deed for the day.  What?  Am I just supposed to let everyone on?  I’ll never get home!” 

Then it hit me, with great power comes great responsibility.  I am no God.  I am the jerk that lets one car in, and thinks he’s done his civic duty.  I’m also the idiot that just rammed into a rusty Volvo.

You’ve won this round God!

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